Posts

Showing posts from January, 2008

One Out Of Four Children Involved In A Divorce Undergoes Parental Alienation Syndrome

One out of four children involved in a divorce and custody litigation undergoes the so-called Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS), consisting of the manipulation of children by the custodial parent, who incessantly tries to turn them against the other parent by arousing in them feelings of hatred and contempt for the target parent, as explained in the book Marital Conflicts, Divorce, and Children’s Development by professors José Cantón Duarte, Mª Rosario Cortés Arboleda, and Mª Dolores Justicia Díaz, from the Department of Evolutionary and Educational Psychology of the University of Granada. In the 1980’s, PAS was defined by scientist Richard Gardner of Columbia University. Men are usually the target parent, since in most cases the mother has custody of the child. According to Mª Rosario Cortés, “the so-called alienating parent is the one who has custody and uses it to brainwash the child, turning him or her against the alienated parent”. In most cases, the process is very subtle the cu

Amy Baker’s Study on Adult Children of PAS

When Ties to a Parent Are Cut by the Other Article in the NY Times - Sept. 2007 THIS is a nice moment in Joe Rabiega’s life. At 31, he has a good job as a research coordinator for the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. He is happily married and feels blessed that his wife of five years, Tiffany, is pregnant with their first child. His hope is to give that child a happier upbringing than the one he had. Mr. Rabiega’s parents divorced when he was 8, and though they were supposed to share custody, he said, his father, a truck driver with a drinking problem, did everything possible to turn him against his mother and eventually kept him from seeing her. “He bullied my mother into giving up custody,” Mr. Rabiega said. When he was still allowed to visit his mother, he’d have to stay by the phone to take a call from his father at 4 every afternoon and 8 each evening. He said his father trained him to spy on his mother’s socializing and spending habits. “His ability to manipulate he

Forms of Parental Alienation

At times an affected parent may withdraw leaving the children to the alienating parent. Children so alienated often suffer effects similar to those studied in the psychology of torture. Alienating parents often use grandparents, aunts/uncles, and elder siblings to alienate their children against the target parent. In some cases, mental health professionals become unwitting allies in these alienation attempts by backing unfounded allegations of neglect, abuse or mental disease. Courts also often side with the alienating parent against the target parent in legal judgements because parental alienation is either difficult to detect or else the time, by mental health professionals, has never been given to the children to detect it. Forms of parental alienation include:- brainwashingcharacter assassination the false inducement of fear incitement of shameusing children to commit relational aggression against the target parentloss of self control flareups of anger unconscious alliances with th

Parental Alienation: It can happen at any age

Don't believe what they say: that Parental Alienation cannot happen to older children, that it's just an oxymoron. Parental Alienation is the act of one parent deliberately undermining the relationship between the children and the other parent to the point of creating a hostile relationship and thus alienation of the children from the other parent. Another way to look at this is alienation of affection, which is one of the basic human needs discussed at length by Maslow in his Hierarchy of Needs. It is a serious form of psychological abuse, and it is very dangerous because it occurs internally and, thus, is harder to treat. Unlike physical abuse where the scars and wounds are on the outside, Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) is so deep inside that unlocking the key to it takes years of treatment and unconditional love. Though PAS is primarily seen in high-conflict divorces, it also occurs in intact families. And though it usually begins in early childhood, this is not alw

Terrorist in the Home

Establishing Fear, Anguish, and Apprehension in the ChildrenBy Joan T. KlothLife Coach/CounselorNovember 11,2007 What do you call it when a parent or person instills such fear and hatred in a child that he/she is afraid to love his/her other parent? What do you call it when a parent uses condescending words and actions to describe the other parent to the point of creating fear of that targeted parent? What do you call it when a parent threatens to not love a child if the child shows any love, compassion or feelings for the other parent? I call it Parental Alienation or Hostile Aggressive Parenting, but someone might call this Terrorism.Terrorism: the word strikes fear in most people's hearts. But what is the actual definition of Terrorism? According to Encarta World English Dictionary, it is: ter·ror·ism nviolence or the threat of violence, especially bombing, kidnapping, and assassination, carried out for political purposes. The synonyms for Terrorism are not better: Violence, int

What you do & don’t do when as a parent you are confronted with a severe case of PAS (as I am)

William Kirkendale, PresidentThe Parental Alienation Syndrome Foundation&The Family Court Reform Council of AmericaLos Angeles, California310-544-7800Web site address: www.familycourts.com E-mail address: info@familycourts.com DO'S DO...take off the gloves and demand immediate action by the Court to STOP the abuse of your child. Remind the Court in the strongest terms possible that your child's life, mental health and their continued on going relationship with you is at stake...AND that if they don't intervene immediately the chances of ever saving your child and your relationship together will be ZERO. DO...start to immediately educate yourself, your lawyer, your judge, your psychologist and your child, if possible, about PAS. This is one of the most widespread forms of emotional child abuse there is arising out of our Family Court system today and there are at least 1,000 internet web sites for you to obtain information from about PAS. DO...fully prepare yourself for

Bereavement Without End-A Plea From Alienated Parents Everywhere

The death of a child is indisputably one of the most incredibly horrible tragedies one can imagine. Whether by sudden accidental circumstance, or by a more lengthy cause as in illness, the loss of a child is undeniably painful to experience. Painful to the parents, parents to the family, and painful to anyone related to the child. Never knowing the laughter of that child again or the tears, the joys and the accomplishments is a pain no parent should ever have to endure, and yet it happens. No one is to blame. It just happens. Imagine the same pain and the same sense of loss, with one exception-the parent is very much aware that the child is alive. The effects of Parental Alienation Syndrome are very similar to the loss of a child due to accident or illness. For the parent who has been alienated from their child, the bereavement does not end. How do we know? Each alienated parent separately, and all of us collectively have lived with both the cause and the effect of Parental Alienation